June 26, 1900

Black Diamond. 

This morning I heard Sabi knocking on the office door downstairs and she greeted me with a hug. Alex rode over on his horse and we greeted each other with hugs. I wasn’t in the best of spirits this morning and told Alex, “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking...” 

“Oh yeah? Is that a good thing?” 

“Not necessarily,” I sighed and he raised his eyebrows. Come on... let’s get some coffee? Sabi, you can join us.”

We walked over to the cafe and sat down with our coffee as Pawsie sat near us at the table. “So, Trin... What have you been thinking about? Or should I not ask?” Alex asked then. 

I hesitated, knowing I hadn’t decided anything yet, and looked at him, knowing it would be impossible if I really did decide to leave. “I don’t know. I’ve just been thinking about this place a lot and work and...”

“You want to leave?” Alex looked at me. 

“I don’t know. I’ve had my bags packed so many times, Alex... I just... can’t do it.”

“I can’t make you stay, Trin. But I do know there would be a lot of people who missed you. Maybe you just need a vacation.” 

“I’m finally in a place where I’ve stayed for longer than three months... But I feel like there’s nothing I’m doing that’s productive. I’ve been trying to figure out how to stay without feeling... stagnant.”

“Life isn’t always about being productive though,” Alex said, “But I do understand your need to have something to do.” 

“What sorta things do you like to do?” Sabi asked me. 

“Alex... I had two huge cases... Last week... The cantina fire and the ladies society fire. But every time I need a lawman to talk to about the evidence or to work with...”

“I know. There is a serious lack of law in this county.” 

“They’re not here. And then there’s dances in the evenings and everyone’s there and I feel bad for ruining it with work.”

“Then go to bed early at night like I do,” Alex winked. “I’m just teasing you know.” 

“Alex, I’m the only Pinkerton Detective in all of Arizona.”

“Or play with tha kids,” Sabi suggested. 

“What have I done to solve cases? How am I supposed to solve them if people won’t...” I shook my head. “I miss when investigating was fun, Alex. I want that back. You remember it too.. you were there. It used to be fun. What happened?”

“I don’t think it was ever fun. I just liked following you around,” Alex said. “I’m not much of a detective.” 

“It was... when I knew who to go to and could get help. Now I’m just on my own. It’s a very boring and frustrating life being this alone, Alex... when I’m working I mean...”

“You know, Trin... I don’t really have much work either,” Alex sighed. 

“I know I’m not really alone... But when was the last time I saw my other best friend?”

“I know,” Alex nodded. 

“I miss her, Alex. And it’s killing me. She’s got her life now... I’ve got... whatever this is. I’m sorry,” I shook my head and drank my coffee. “You two are here... that means the world to me. And Pawsie. I just need.... something.” I reached over and put a hand on Alex’s arm and said,  “You know I’m not blaming anyone... and I know you don’t have work either. It’s just a lull..”

“All I do here is have coffee and breakfast. But I’m content with that. I guess for me, I just need social interaction.” 

“So do I,” I nodded. 

“And be an uncle,” Sabi put in. “And save stupid kids from themselves... both of you do that.” 

“Yes, Sabi. That’s my most important job,” Alex smiled. “You’re not stupid!” 

“Aw Sabi you’re not a stupid kid,” I looked at her. 

“Just got caught up with the wrong people but that’s in the past now and you’re with a better family,” I told her, feeling a sadness at that word but tried not to show it. 

“Yanno what?” Sabi asked and said, “I was gonna leave too.” 

“What made you stay?”

“I think we’ve all been there at some point,” Alex nodded. 

“I found that place up behind town there with Miss Sarrah’s memorial. And I looked at all the love that went into it and saw the hearts of the people who live here. And I wanted to keep bein a part of that.” 

“That’s a really nice thing,” Alex smiled. 

“I think that’s why I’ve been here so long,” I nodded. “So many others have been here longer.”

“Miss Pet said something that stuck with me. Everyone matters. I don’t know anywhere else that can say that and even pretend its true,” Sabi said. 

“Trin... you of all people know that I almost left too. And the reason I didn’t...” Alex looked at me. “You and Aly.” 

“That’s why I’m still here,” I held his hand tightly. 

“We might not be blood relatives, but I consider you family,” Alex smiled at me and I agreed. 

“So tell me... what’s been going on around here this week? Did anyone figure out those two fires? Or even talk about them?” I asked then. 

“You know I think you do really good,” Sabi said. “I came to you with stuff I worried about with Ben cause you planted that suggestion in me when you first found out I was connected to him. And guess what? It was all true.” 

“I knew he wasn’t trustworthy,” I nodded. “Something about him made me concerned. He threatened me... I think that’s what it was anyway. Who’ll ever know.”

“But you took vague information and put it out there until it became something specific.” 

“Trin is good at that,” Alex nodded. 

“He told me one of my old case suspects would be back... But I’m done waiting around for something to happen. Can’t live my life on edge like that, right Alex?” I looked at him. 

“No, you can’t,” he nodded. 

“See... growth,” I smiled and he chuckled. “So it goes into the cold cases file... it can keep the others company. Then they’ll resurrect months later like when Joe helped me solve the case with Cym. See cases has life to them... I love investigating that life and figuring it out. Sometimes they go to sleep for a while and you gotta wait for the right person or fact to wake it back up again.”

“I know what you mean. I feel that way about my patients. I love to figure out what’s wrong with them,” Alex nodded. 

“And I love eating cookies and finding out what they is made of,” Sabi put in. 

“So what were the cookies I gave you yesterday made of?” Alex laughed at Sabi. 

“Ohhh choccie chip Uncle Alex!” 

“Oh good! You’re favorite,” Alex grinned. 

Sabi explained then how she couldn’t decide between Stormy and Mike or Ger and Sugar, so she had both as parents. We talked about the cantina fire and how White Owl was still my most likely suspect. We talked about the ladies society fire and then Sabi talked about how Poppy had been missing since Alex and Aly’s wedding. 

Ger walked in then and told us about how his brother in law had passed away. He asked Alex to take care of the town while he was away since Alex was Deputy Mayor. Halo came into the saloon as well as Sugar. Sabi announced she was going to make peace with Adrianna since she knew she was hurting badly. 

“You all know the one called Old Fat Bill?” Halo looked around at us after some time. 

“I know him,” I nodded. 

“Hmmm, Yeah I think I’ve seen him around,” Alex agreed. 

“He say to me last night, ‘When we get married?’ And he is loco!!” Halo smiled. 

“I tend to agree with you Halo,” Ger chuckled. 

“Ese muy loco!” Halo laughed. “I tell him, when a man marry me, he die!” she laughed harder. “He say, he say, well, is almost time for me!”

“But I thought you had eyes for Mr. Ty....from the way you reacted to him yesterday,” Ger said then. 

“He then say no, no, he no will marry me, I no remember why... something I say...” Halo waved a hand around. 

“Oh my Miss Halo that is a very big surprise he said that. I thought him an old confirmed bachelor,” Sugar said. 

“Senor Ty... he is good man.. The old man, Senor Bill, he just talking, he no mean it,” She blushed and looked at Ger. 

“He change his mind quick huh?” Sugar asked. 

“I think I scare him...” Halo giggled. 

“Ty... the one who’s nervous around me,” I said then. 

“Si, is the one. Senor Ty, with the black curls on his forehead...” Halo nodded, blushing deep. 

“Hun, I’m nervous around you,” Ger chuckled and Alex laughed as well. 

“And, then, the man, Bill, he shoot Senor Trent!” Halo exclaimed. 

“Why did he do that?” Ger asked. 

“Is Mr. Trent okay?” Sabi asked. 

“He what?!” I sat up straighter, not liking the idea of Trent Ashland being shot. 

“Is called a... a... a duel?” Halo shrugged. 

“Men,” I rolled my eyes. 

“Senor Matthew, he make them go by the trading post, then help Senor Trent to Mees Bree,” Halo said.

“HEY, we ain’t all that way Trin,” Ger defended his gender. 

“Old Bill I think is very good with a gun.. but it is something not many realize,” Sugar said then. 

“I ain’t ever shot anyone,” Alex said. 

“Uh huh. What happened to the whole concept of arm wrestling?” I sighed. 

“Then, the woman that was at the cantina ayer, yesterday, she was shot, too,” Halo frowned. 

“No you are not all that way Ger,” Sugar reached across to take Ger’s hand. 

“Thank you love, at least someone appreciates me,” Ger said to her, sticking his tongue out at me and then laughed. 

“She and a woman in red, they go with White Owl. The woman, in the red, she takes the gun. Senor Matthew, he tells her put it away, she no listen. she point it at him, so he shoot her. Someone shot the other, the Meg, at that time,” Halo nodded. 

“Any law know about this, Halo?” I asked. 

“Senor Matthew, he the law that shoot them,” Halo nodded. 

“Good.” 

“Is what happen, you point a gun at law, and no listen,” Halo shrugged. 

“He had to get her to put the gun away. If she didn’t listen he had to protect the others.”

“Mees Bree, she do much work last night on all the shot people,” Halo sighed.

“Silly adults.... why cant they just trade lollipops like us?” Sabi muttered. 

“It’s her fault for not listening to the law,” I said and Halo nodded. 

“Who shot Miss Meg though????” Ger asked. 

“Shouldn’t have guns out in town. What was Matthew supposed to do?” I asked. 

“Is her friend or Senor Matthew, I no do know. I did no go see,” Halo took a sip of coffee. 

“Have you see Senor Trent today? he is alright?” Halo asked Bree then as she entered the cafe. 

“I just got here so no not seen a soul,” Bree said. 

“I think I’m going to go check on Trent,” I said then. “He checked in on me when I got shot... it’s the least I can do.”

I said goodbye to everyone and went to the canyon where Trent’s family lived. I found out that the victim was a different Trent, not Trent Ashland. Met his fiance and debated in myself about feelings for him knowing I could never be with him like that. I went home and tried to move on from a past that continued to haunt me.