Black Diamond.
This morning I walked over to Aly’s and found her in the tree. I climbed up beside her and we talked about the dance last night and how much fun it was. “I didn’t mean to worry you guys about the clinic yesterday... I just knew I couldn’t dance all night long,” I said eventually.
“I know Trin but see my thing is... Alex walks in...and the first thing that comes to mind is me wanting to hug him.”
“I know. I wasn’t expecting to have you guys be all over me like that. I was just siting at the piano. Figured that if I really needed you guys I would have gone over to you but I was trying to push through it. It just.. washes in when I don’t expect it and I have to sit down. That’s what Ger told me to do. I can’t control it. Next time I’ll just walk out. That’s what I was gonna do but you wouldn’t let me.”
“It’s just you were doing so well...dancing, and having fun, and drinking, and then it was sudden. We’re you friends, and we care about you. I don’t want you walking out. I just wish you’d try and relax more, I think you build yourself up into stress...I’m not a doctor, but I just think you should try and take it easy.”
“That’s what I was doing, Aly. It was a big step that I was there and stayed as long as I did. I can’t control when it happens. I’m sorry I ruined your fun. Next time I’ll just stay home.”
“See Trin. you have GOT to stop thinking like that,” she frowned. Please don’t assume you ruin my fun. You don’t. Only I can control whether I’m having fun or not. Same with Alex.”
“At least he was there to see you and stayed as long as he did. Before you started going out he never came around in the evenings. At least you’re worth coming around for.”
“Trin that really hurts me, and I’m feeling insulted by it. I’m going inside,” she said and climbed down.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to take it out on you but it just... It hurts that I can’t control when this happens. And it felt like you were blaming me for it.”
“Just..leave me be right now... ok? I’d like to be alone,” she said and walked inside.
I kicked the tree as she went in, frustrated with myself. I found a piece of paper and wrote the following note, leaving it in the mailbox:
Aly, I’m sorry. all I want to do is just talk things out. I’m sorry I offended you by saying that about Alex, it’s just that I.. Yesterday really scared me and Ger and Myst barely stayed around to finish looking me over before they rushed to another wedding and I was left alone. I’m afraid and I’m exhausted and it’s no excuse but it’s all I can say. I’m sorry, Aly. You both mean the world to me and I didn’t mean to make you worry. I want to be a better friend, I want to be in a better mood and be more optimistic but I just don’t know how. I’m sorry... Trin
Tombstone.
I walked around Allen street, letting the tears fall. I saw Ger in front of the Oriental and tried to wipe away the tears as he walked over to me.
“Trin, what’s wrong?” he looked at me with concern. I fell into his arms, holding onto him like I was clinging for breath. “Come on, let’s get you in a chair,” he guided me inside and sat me down at a table and got a cup of coffee for each of us from Sugar who was behind the counter.
“Slow, deep breaths Trin,” Ger instructed and I ignored the coffee in front of me.
“I’ve messed it all up. It’s over. I just can’t...”
“Slow down...”
“She’s upset and I said things and it hurt her and I...” I choked on my tears.
Ger took a cloth from the table and wiped my eyes with it. “Start from the beginning.”
“Ger what’s wrong with me? Why do I always have to screw things up? Why can’t things just happen easily for me? Things were supposed to be different here. Life was supposed to get better, not worse.”
“If things were easy, then they wouldn’t be worth it.”
“I was at the dance last night... in Kate’s.. Was having a good time...”
“Tell me what happened, slowly, from the beginning.”
“Aly was bartending and I was dancing... Then Alex came in. I started to panic and the feeling of aloneness and abandonment and change and fear washed over me. Cause I saw how happy they were. And I remembered how he only came around town at nights when we were dating. He never did after that. Until he started seeing her. And I remembered how James hasn’t... And everyone else is all happy and dancing together and going off to weddings together and I’m left in town alone... Ger, what if the killer comes and I’m alone? Even Dutch won’t let me think about him like that anymore ‘cause he admitted he was a rambler.”
“Now Trin, I’m sure James has his reasons for not being here lately.”
“What the hell’s the point of getting out of bed? I’ll just screw up every relationship and everyone else’s fun. I sat at the piano and just played to calm myself down... But Alex looked over and was worried. So Aly seemed upset about it this morning and it felt like she was blaming me for taking his attention away. But I can’t control when this happens and I... I did stay only ‘cause they told me to. I said this morning that at least he came around for her in the evenings.. And at least she’s worth coming around for. And she was upset and I don’t blame her. I messed everything up again.”
“Shh... I’ll talk to Aly.”
“What’s the point... they’ll both be upset with me now. I’ll lose both of them like I knew I would.. I’m scared, Ger.”
“You don’t know that...friendships run deeper than that.”
“What’s wrong with me?” I asked, finally reaching for the coffee.
“You are lonely, thats all that is...your friends have someone....you see this, you are happy for them, but you want that same feeling they have.”
“I don’t think it’s just that I’m lonely. I think it’s that I’m afraid of being lonely when the killer comes. Dutch coming the other night proves it’s still gonna happen. And that fear is controlling everything I do. Everything I say. And I hate it, Ger.”
“You have all of us around Trin....even Tye.”
“When he’s here... Then Peta comes and takes him away again. Yesterday when you were all at the wedding... It was so quiet. And not in the good way. What if the killer came then?”
“Trin, we still don’t know if he really is coming...and if he does, we will be with you.”
“What about yesterday when I was alone?”
“We will all come running.”
“Ger can I ask you an ethical question?”
“Of course.”
“Okay.... You know how the code says not to consult with criminals?”
“Yes.”
“What about a situation like this.. when I need all the protection I can get? Would it be wrong to talk to someone like Jack and Sommer? It was different than talking with Sniper ‘cause he knew Dutch and Gaide...”
“I think you can talk to both of them and ask for help...Sommer has changed since being married and from what I saw from Jack on Friday, he has as well.”
“So it wouldn’t be wrong to?”
“No...sometimes using others with ‘different’ background could prove useful with their insights on the enemy.”
“Exactly,” I nodded. “That’s exactly it. I knew you were the right person to talk to...” I sighed and sipped my coffee. “You’ll talk to Aly?”
“Now, sit here, calm down, breath deeply. I think it is time to talk to Aly about what kind of prevention we can take for you.”
“Law shadows never work. I’ve been there. I just need to know there’s... people around,” I said and thought of James being just that kind of shadow.
“We need to change your routine, the normal places you go, do things... First where you are staying... Second, where you work,” he said and I frowned. “Don’t give me that.”
We talked about how I should stay at a hotel in Bisbee and maybe work around Tombstone more, where there was sure to be people around. Ger suggested that I stay at the Apache village and I refused strongly, knowing how my past had been with staying among the Natives and not wanting to have to go through that again. I decided to work all over the area more, instead of just in Diamond, and he agreed that was a good idea.
We changed topics and started talking about the case against Kris and then we talked with Sugar about how things had been going with her. We talked about the election and how Sugar should come out to Diamond more often. Ger declared he had three major goals when he became mayor: Select a Deputy Mayor, get the Town Council set up and open the court house.
After a while I thanked Ger for talking with me and headed to the hotel in Bisbee to get settled in there.
Tombstone.
I walked down the street a few hours later and saw a man laying on the bed in the clinic. I walked in and asked, “You alright, Sir?”
“No!” he moaned, in pain.
“What happened?”
“Who wants to know?” he coughed.
“I’m a detective, Sir. I can help you figure it out. I can try and find a doctor for you.”
“If you could find a doctor... would be a good thing!”
“Let me work on that. Were you shot?”
“A few times...” he said and I went to work on the telegram.
“Who shot you, Sir?” I asked the man.
The door opened then and I saw Kris walk in. “Where did this happen?” he asked right away.
“He’s been reluctant to give me information,” I nodded to the man on the bed. “I don’t even know his name yet.”
“By the bank... I think he was trying to break in... tried to stop him...” the man winced.
“What town?”
“Here!”
“Did the person say anything to you before they shot you?” I asked.
“Bunch of cuss words...”
“Was there anyone else with him?”
“No! Y’all gonna stand... there, or find him... before he makes it clear out of the territory!” he moaned.
“Sir we can’t find him if we don’t know what he looks like or anything like that,” I said.
“Big guy... black hat and jacket... long hair and beard!” he described and I looked at Kris. “Pearl handled irons...”
“Now we’re getting somewhere.. Where did he shoot you, Sir? I’m sure there will be a doctor here soon,” I told him.
“My leg!”
I reached over to hold his arm as Kris left the clinic and asked, “What’s your name, hon?”
“Nathan.”
“Nathan, I’m Trin... If you can hold on and be patient with me here I’m sure we’ll have help soon. Can you tell me what happened from the beginning?” I asked but he passed out.
It wasn’t long before Ya’ii came in to work on the man’s wound. She and Kris tended to it as the man continued to be passed out. Another man came in with Kris matching the description Nathan had given, but he insisted that he’d never seen the man before and didn’t know what he was talking about. He said his name was Lucius Kincaid and he handed over his gun to show that the bullets weren’t his.
When he’d been looked after by Ya’ii, and I’d gotten a statement from Lucius, Kris headed out of the clinic with Ya’ii.
“Where did that big bastard go?!!” Nathan yelled when we were alone.
“Sir I think you were confused. If he shot you, he wouldn’t have willingly come with the marshal and given up his gun as proof. It just wouldn’t happen.”
“Might he have more than one gun?” he looked at me strangely. “Gee, Here is a gun I didn’t shoot him with... see, I’m innocent.”
“It’s not my call to make, it’s the marshals. I’m just a detective who saw a man in a clinic and tried to get him help.”
“Well, maybe I’ll put a few into the Marshall, then hand over a different gun, so I’m innocent.”
“You’re welcome for getting you a doctor. Stay out of trouble, Nathan,” I said and walked out of the clinic. I walked over to the sheriff’s office and knocked on the door, hoping Kris would be inside.
Kris walked out and asked, “Yes?”
“I think we can let that one go. Something seems off there and I don’t think Lucius was involved.”
“I agree. Too convenient for someone to suddenly flip out at the sight of a man being peaceful.”
“Mmhmm. I’m okay with letting this go if you are. It’s in your hands.”
“That and the fact that Lucius even wanted to clear things up.”
“Right. Someone who shot him wouldn’t just hand over his gun. Thanks for coming so quickly, Kris. I appreciate it. I’d watch your back around him. He has it in for you, it would seem.”
“How many outlaws and wannabe outlaws here do you know who would do that?”
“Not many.”
“People always do. Comes with the badge.”
“True enough. Have a good day, Kris. Stay safe,” I reached out and shook his hand. “If Nathan wants to press charges I’m sure he’ll come to you seriously about it. Till then, it’s all yours. See you,” I said and walked off.
I walked down the street and blinked when I saw Kyle standing in the middle of the road. “Kyle... long time no see.”
“Yea, been a bit. How are you?”
“Honestly? Could use a drink.”
“Been a long day?”
“Yeah. But I need to get out to Diamond...”
“You let him go Marshal... you must be on the take... I know how to settle a score!” I heard Nathan shout and shook my head.
“That’s a good hint to how this day has been.”
“Things still look the same, from what I see.”
“It’s good to see a familiar face.”
“Trying to remember the last time we talked,” I said, trying to ignore the continuing shouts from Nathan.
“Gee... I have been gone quite a while.”
“Yeah you have.. Seems like forever ago.”
“Ya, after Cooky and I split, I left here for a bit. Came back for a wedding though. A friend asked me to give her away. Since then... haven’t been back. How’s the detective business?”
“It’s alright I guess. Things have been stressful lately. Really could use a drink...” I looked at him, wondering if that’d be a good idea, considering our history.
We headed to Kate’s and poured back a few glasses of whiskey before he asked, “So may I ask... why so stressed?”
I looked at him and took a deep breath. “Yesterday I was in the clinic because I fainted from the
stress of having a serial killer over me. Then I got into a fight with my best friend this morning and then I just dealt with a gunshot wound from a guy who blamed some other guy who wasn’t around when it happened and handed over his gun as proof that it wasn’t him. And now the wounded guy is yelling at the marshal for letting him go free.”
“Yup, I can see why you might be stressed,” he raised an eyebrow and poured me another glass. “Here hun, you need this.”
“Meanwhile my so called boyfriend hasn’t been around in at least a week and his office was burned down just after I saw him last... and the first man I ever loved back in Colorado has come back to keep me safe from this serial killer who’s after his family, and who has my name and picture because of the book I wrote about him.”
“Wow, that’s a lot to handle.”
“It’s too damn much,” I looked at him. “I’m losing it.”
“Relax, my friend. Deep breaths.”
“I’ve been having these anxiety attacks lately because of the fear and stress...”
“Maybe a vacation? Get away for a bit.”
“I don’t know what to do, Kyle. I’ve been rearranging my routine and spending more time in Tombstone where there’s more law, instead of Diamond where I live now... I went up north the last two weekends to see family.”
“Seems you need a break from it all...”
“I need something to break, Kyle. I need something good.”
“I understand... Just don’t bust anyone’s head. Find a nice glass window,” he smiled.
“Don’t tempt me,” I sighed. “How’ve you been? Hopefully better than me.”
“I am well, have twins coming in a few weeks, pretty excited about that.”
“Congratulations. Who are you married to now?”
“Miss being here. Her name is Carrie. She doesn’t come here too much.”
“Glad you’re happy hon. You deserve that.”
“Thank you. I am very happy... Miss this place though. I will have to come back more often.”
“Mmhmm.”
“And I promise to stay out of trouble.”
“Uh huh, that’s what they all say.”
He poured us both a glass of whiskey and raised his glass to mine. “To old friends?”
I clinked his glass and smiled, “Seem to recall we used to be a lot more.”
“Yea... we were,” he smiled.
“For a bit anyway...”
“Timing was lousy, but I enjoyed every minute we had Trin.”
“Timing did suck, yes. Usually does,” I sighed.
“Well, that’s enough for me,” he finished his glass and put the bottle away. “Want to walk out of here, not crawl.” He put a hand on my shoulder and said, “Hang in there, hun. You a toughie.”
“I’m not sure I’m so tough anymore.”
“Yea you are, just hang in there.”
“I think we should take a walk. Before I let myself drink anymore.”
We walked out of the saloon and Kyle had to take care of something so I headed down the street. I noticed a crowd in the clinic and saw Kris laying on a bed. I shook my head and walked in but Ben looked at me with suspicion.
“Back off. I do not trust anyone now,” he held his hands on his gun.
“You know me. We talked in Diamond yesterday. I’m Detective Trin Paige,” I looked at him.
“Kris, what happened?”
“Yea sorry, I just was at the sheriff office when this poor man got shot next to me,” Ben relaxed.
“You witnessed it?” I asked as Mikk took care of Kris’ wounds.
“Yes, and I did call this doctor for him or he was dead now.”
“Can you write out a statement for us?” I asked and handed it to him.
Ben wrote out a statement and I took it from him, thanking him for it. I took the statement over to the sheriff’s office and dropped it into his mailbox and then headed for Diamond.
Black Diamond.
I walked over to the cantina and saw a crowd of people talking. Aly was sitting on the railing and I looked straight at her, not caring there were others around. “Aly.... can we talk... please?”
“I’m still mad at you!” she grumbled at me.
I sighed, realizing I’d have to talk to her in front of everyone. “Alright, then just hear me out, please... I’m sorry for what I said this morning. I’m sorry that I’ve been such a burden and that I’ve let my emotions and fear control me. But Aly, that’s all it is.”
“Trin...” she blushed but I kept talking.
“I’m afraid. I’m deadly afraid and it’s starting to control me. The only reason I said what I did this morning was because I’m afraid of being alone when this killer comes after me. It’s not about jealousy. It’s not about wanting what you have with Alex; what he and I have is a special friendship and I’m happy with that. I don’t want to stand between you two but I need you to understand that things have been getting serious. With Gaide coming... and with Dutch coming... This is very real and it’s very scary and that’s the only thing behind what I said this morninng. I need you to believe that,” I hesitated.
“I met those two, I thought was nice?” Bree blinked.
“Dutch and Gaide are coming here to warn me. To remind me that I have to be on my guard. I didn’t mean to upset you, Aly...” I said though I could tell she was embarrassed. “But you wouldn’t come talk to me so I had to say all this here with everyone around.”
“Oh then they are good guys. I am relieved,” Bree said.
“I’m sorry everyone,” I looked around.
“You know, this wall is really high up, I didn’t really get a chance to get off. I just got on,” Aly said.
“Is good ya did Trin. You and Aly been good friends need each other,” Bree said.
“Now more than ever,” I nodded.
“You need to understand....and Ger and I talked about this earlier...” Aly started.
“Trin, I don’t know what is going on and it’s none of my business but we are friends and you know if you need a friend I’m here,” Jess put in then.
“This killer hasn’t been in Black Diamond. No crime has been commited. I can’t get a warrant...” Aly said. “I don’t even have a name.”
“Aly, that’s not the point...”
“I guess I’m missing it because...if you’re wanting him locked up or hung...I just....I have nothing. SO... Until there is something here...you need to relax.”
“The point is that a serial killer has my name and picture because of a book I wrote about Dutch. I’m still a target and I have no idea who is after me. The point is that I need to be on my guard but also this fear is healthy, to a point.”
“You get yourself worked up.”
“The minute I relax is the minute he’s gonna come out of nowhere.”
“Yeah and until then everyone around you is on edge too. You have GOT to calm down. You make it worse this way..how are you going to be on your guard when you’re allowing your emotions to take over?”
“You think that’s easy? You think that’s just like flicking a match to turn on or off a candle?”
“No I don’t. Not at all. And I never said that. You’ve got lots of protection, hell you know how to use those guns.”
“I just need to know you understand how serious this is.”
“My thoughts exactly, Aly,” Pet agreed.
“I don’t know the past in any of this.”
“I’ve tried to explain it.”
“No kidding you do and so just got snap out of this,” Bree said.
“But I know the crap you’ve been through, and that you’re tougher for it. Gotta bring that tough girl out now Trin. ok?” Aly looked at me.
“I just...” I sighed, not needing to be lectured again.
“What do you want me to do? Poor Trin! It’s hopeless! I refuse to do that,” Aly said.
“No, that’s not what I want you to do.”
“Then what? You want me to go back to Colorado with you?”
“Sometimes, Aly? Just to listen. To understand that sometimes I just need to talk things out and they can’t be solved.”
“I do listen. I’m good at that. People trust me, they confide in me. I offer help, suggestions...but it’s up to the other person to take what I say.”
“I know you’re scared... I can see it, feel it even.”
“Pet when people come to you for prayer... do they always accept it when you give answers?” I looked over at her. “Or do they just sometimes need a person to talk to?”
“Um, not to interject into what might be a voluble discussion, but I believe you are a Pinkerton, am I not correct, Miss Trin?” Demarco asked.
“Please don’t bring her into this,” Aly insisted.
“I’m just saying, Aly. Sometimes I’m not looking for a solution or an answer.”
“This is true aly. I talk me head off usually does not good. But Pet now she ken always straighten my thoughts,” Bree said.
“Sometimes I just need to talk.”
“Trin... I was listening just fine until you made the comment about my man. I got insulted... and I’m not going to deal with that.”
“Huh? oh! um, do they always accept. heck no,” Pet said eventually.
“I know. And I’m sorry for that, I really am,” I sighed.
“Well that’s what it was. I didn’t want to listen at that point.”
“I’m happy that you both are happy. It’s not about jealousy. My fear was driving me. I was left all alone yesterday and the fear that the killer could come at that moment was what fuled my comment. And I’m sorry. God, I’m so sorry...”
“You KNOW damn well that I’ve listened to you time and time again, over coffee, in a tree, wherever,” Aly shot back.
“Ladies, calm down,” Pet tried to speak calmly.
“I’m just... sorry.”
“You need to apologize to Alex. That comment was offensive to him as well.”
I kicked at the dust and said, “I need to go. I’m the one that needs to go.”
“You know I love you. you’re still my best friend,” she said as I started to walk away, crying. “Stop running away from everything!’
“I’m going to find Alex and leave him a note. I can’t keep apologizing enough. I don’t know what else to say.”
“Then stop doing things you need to apologize for.”
I walked towards the garden and sat down crying. Pet walked over to me and sat down beside me. “Trin? What was that all about?”
“I should just leave. Let the killer find me.”
“Now you have yourself a good cry and when you collect yourself, you tell me what that is all about please.”
“Everything’s falling apart.”
“How so?”
“I’m not like this Pet. I’m usually logical and can think through things and not let the emotion control me.”
“Well I’m listenin’.”
“Gaide sent me a telegram to tell me that there’s a serial killer that has my name and picture, because of the book that I wrote about Dutch. It wasn’t long before he came here to warn me that things were getting serious. The other night, Dutch even came.”
“And...? How come he wants to kill YOU?”
“I don’t know. I really don’t. All I know is that I was on a note left with a body and that makes me a target. And the fact that Gaide and Dutch are coming here to warn me... It’s scaring me . A lot. My past is haunting me. My fear is controlling me.”
“Well that can kinda really affect your ability to get work don’t huh? I mean you have to be willing to talk to everyone. Killers included right?
“That’s the thing. my work hasn’t suffered. My work has been a good distraction and I’m closing cases and helping people get statements. It’s my relationships that are suffering. James isn’t here and I need him. I’m saying things off hand to Aly and making her upset and I didn’t even mean them to upset her. I just... everyone else is so happy, Pet. Everyone else has someone with them all the time.”
“And.... so since your job causes you to have nerves of steal you being fearful seems strange to me.”
“I’m scared that if he comes I’m going to be alone like I was yesterday when everyone else was at the wedding.”
“Don’t you know how to use those yet?” she looked at my guns.
“It’s not about that though.”
“Then you best tell me what its about.”
“It’s about... being alone.”
“Oh hell, loneliness. hon that’s part of the human condition. Ya can’t make someone want ya.”
“It’s not even about having a man, Pet.”
“Well... ya cant make the Deputy your personal body guard none neither. She gots the whole town to look over.”
“I know.”
“So why you mad then?”
“I’m mad at myself.”
“Get over it. You gots lots of time to be mad at yourself in a lifetime. Use ‘em sparingly,” she smiled softly. We’ll talk soon Trin. I forgot I have a visiting pastor coming for Holy Week services. Peace,” she said and walked off then.
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