July 13, 1869

Amiville. 

The next day I sat in the saloon and talked with the people who were there. Jess, Kitty and I talked as I pulled out my notebook to write. Out of nowhere Sayler came in and kissed me on the lips. I was taken aback and just stared as he went to lean against the pole in the saloon. 

“Well that was some greeting, Sayler!” I exclaimed, trying to compose myself. 

“You just looked like you needed a kiss, and I had an extra.” 

“Don’t you worry about that,” I said, thinking of my growing feelings for Dutch. 

“Oh my... that’s good to hear,” Sayler smiled. “Met you a man, did ya?” 

“Well,” I chuckled, unsure how to answer him. “I’m not sure if it counts... We ain’t exactly courtin’ or nothin’... I’m not even sure if’n I want to pursue it.” 

“Well, kissin’ is better than courtin’ anyhow,” Sayler observed, making me laugh. 

“Nothin’ wrong with just being friends, Ms. Trin,” Gramps said from behind the bar. 

“Indeed, Gramps,” I nodded and then let the conversation continue around me as people came and left the saloon. 

That afternoon I spoke at length with a girl named Jessika. We talked about where she was from and what had brought her to Amiville. When she asked my story and I started talking about Dutch, Harley Buu walked in and we continued to talk about Dutch’s murder investigation. 

“Then I found out that the man wasn’t in fact dead this whole time and I was able to meet him in person and...” I hesitated. 

“And...?” Buu prompted. 

“And now... I can’t stop thinking about him.” 

“Um... So what’s the problem?” Buu asked. 

“I’m afraid of gettin’ involved with a marked man, I s’pose,” I looked at Buu and said, “This ain’t over, Buu... It’s far from over.” 

“Well, does he like you?” 

“It seemed like we both felt something, but I...” I looked over at Jess and said, “I’m sorry, Jess. This must sound all confusin’ to you.” 

“Sounds like a romance novel in the making,” Jess giggled. 

“Heck, even Dutch admitted he’s confused as hell. I don’t even think he knows who wants him dead. All I know is his brother’s in jail because they thought he was involved. And it makes no sense.” 

I let them continue to talk and then decided to head home. As I walked through town I realized I should go to Kansas and let Helen know that Dutch was actually alive.

Kansas

I rode out to her house and dismounted excitedly when I saw her working in the garden. 

“I have incredible news!” I exclaimed, tying my horse to the fence. 

“Any news of Dutch?” Helen asked, looking at me with hopeful eyes. 

“He’s alive!! I was right! He’s been alive this whole time!” 

“Alive!” she gasped. 

“Yes!” I moved closer. “I spoke with him just the other night with his brother Josh and Ascot and Corri...” 

“How...” she leaned to support herself against the fence. 

“Yeah, that was pretty much my reaction too!” I chuckled. 

“How is this possible?” 

“Can I come in and we can sit and talk? It’s quite a story.” 

We went inside and sat down in the living room and drank tea while I told her all about what I had discovered from my conversation with Dutch’s family. Helen just listened in disbelief and I knew she was surprised to hear that her friend was suddenly alive. 

When I finished telling her everything I said, “Who knows what will happen now... Ascot about shot Dutch in the living room right there.” 

“They’ll probably bust Gaide out,” Helen said. “Sounds like Ascot alright.” 

“But then Dutch is still in danger... And I...” I looked down. 

Helen nodded and asked, “You what?” 

“I think I’ve somehow developed feelings for him...” 

“For who? Dutch?” 

“I didn’t want to... I never expected to... But he just...” I sighed. “I can understand why the ladies love him.” When she just smiled knowingly I said, “People are starting to ask when they see us in the saloon. Even if I’m just writing and he’s sitting nowhere near me... They see the way we look at each other.” I looked desperately into Helen’s eyes. “I’m scared, Helen.” 

“Look into your heart. Only you can decide what is best.” 

“I never intended to get this involved. But when I saw him... sitting in front of me...” 

“But he’s a ladies man I will warn you.” 

“Yes, I’ve heard... that’s another reason I’m wary of him.” 

“You seem like a smart woman, Trin. Feel your way.” 

“My way seems so bloody confusin’ right now, pardon the language. I just don’t know what to do... Or what’s gonna happen next...” 

“Dutch has only ever been a friend to me and he is a good chap as a friend.” 

“I just knew I had to come see you... to get your take on this all...” 

“I wish you luck if you are gambling on a romance. He won’t be shocked I said that,” she smiled. 

“I still believe his heart belongs to another, though she hasn’t explicitly said so...” I hesitated. 

“Really? Who may that be?” 

“You remember how I told you that Chels had received his badge...” 

“Oh yes,” Helen nodded. 

“She said they were just close but... Every time I talk to her it seems she’s hodlin’ something back.” 

“Hmm... Female intuition,” Helen observed. When I nodded she said, “Well it may be she holds a torch for him. Plenty do. No saying he feels the same.” 

“I’m worried, Helen,” I sighed. 

“Why, Trin?” 

“I don’t want to be just one of the many... but I also know that these feelings are strong for him.” 

“Well just tread lightly.” 

“I can’t stop thinking about him,” I told her. “I see him when I go to sleep. I wonder what he’s up to, if he’s alright.” 

“Trin...” Helen smiled. “Seems like the decision is out of your hands. You’ve fallen for him.” 

“Seems like a lot of things are out of my hands,” I sighed. 

“Trin, I hate to do this, but I have a dress fitting to attend,” Helen stood then. “I’m so glad you came with this news.” 

“I’m glad you were here,” I smiled and stood. 

“Please say hello to Dutch for me,” she said as we walked to the door. 

“I will. I sure will,” I promised and headed home.